I'm happy for you, I really am. I can see he makes you happy. And as your best friend, if you're happy, so am I. I love when you smile, and it hurts like you wouldn't believe to see you cry.
It sort of bothers me though, that you feel it's okay to forget everyone else's existence. You have no idea how incredibly happy I used to be when we'd spend every waking moment together. When Steve told us that story about the summer he spent every possible second with his best friend, and then fell head over heels for him, the only thing I could think of, was you. Because, truthfully, I think that's what's happened. Actually, I know that's what's happened.
So, maybe that's my problem. Maybe I'm jealous because you're always with this new guy. Maybe the best friend in me just hates to be forgotten. You're not the first one to do that to me, so maybe that's why it bothers me. Maybe it's the rest of me that just wants to be the one to make you that happy.
Maybe I'm just not good enough.
I know it bothers you that I've been spending so much time with Steve lately, but it shouldn't. You've decided that your boyfriend takes precedence over us. You don't see it, but I do, and so does he. So who better to talk to, confide in, and spend time with, than the only person who sees where I'm coming from? I know you don't like that I can tell him more than I can you, simply because he's "your Steve", as you've told me many times. I know it also bothers you when I talk about how me and Shannon have been friends since we were only two and three. You make that clear, too.
Maybe I'm just losing sight at what I've been getting at. I don't like the way you've been treating me. I don't like, even more, the way you've been treating Shannon or Steve. It's not their fault that they've decided to really stick by me. It's not their fault that you haven't. I don't understand how you could do such a 180 turn, and go from the person you were, to the person you are now. I know you're territorial, and I know you're posessive, but I'm allowed to have more friends than just one, and I'm allowed to do things with them if you're going to ignore me. Even if you're not. Please, I'm begging you, come down off of that pedestal you've placed yourself upon.
You know I'd give up anything for you. I've made that quite clear time and time again. If you said "jump", I'd ask you how high, how far, and how many times. Please don't forget my name all together. I miss you.
Maybe I'm being over-dramatic, maybe I'm just that hung up on you. Either way.
-Your Best Mistake-